Many people feel like the idea of marriage therapy is too onerous, especially if one feels like they are thinking of divorce. I am a Collaborative Family Lawyer as well as a Relationship Counsellor. In my work I am finding couples are often not sure whether they want to end their relationship and not sure whether it is worth working on it. Perhaps they may have one partner who wants to leave and the other who wants to repair the relationship. Discernment counselling can assist you to become clear. Coming to counselling does not mean you have to both feel the same desire to work on the relationship. Both individuals in the relationship can and often will have differing perspectives and in discernment counselling there is no pressure for them to be the same. Rather, there is the opportunity for both to be heard and understood and to get clearer in a process of respectful enquiry that facilitates and allows both to be with their experience in order to see what emerges.
If you are unsure about whether to stay or go, or if one of you is unsure and the other wants to work on the relationship, all is not lost. Discernment counselling could be the opportunity you are looking for. Before you take the step of ending the relationship you may want to feel like you really gave it your best shot. Or that you made the decision to end the relationship feeling very certain that you were clear and would not regret your decision. Feel free to contact me to discuss further!
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